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Over the Rainbow
by Steven L. Anderson, Ph.D., MBA
I was sitting in the patio of a great
restaurant in Chagrin Falls, OH, holding the hand of my beloved
wife. I had a deep sense of inner peace because I felt like ILS
had just reached a milestone, and then I heard it. Over the
sound system of the restaurant I heard a song, “Somewhere Over
the Rainbow”, that immediately took me back to a time long, long
ago.
As a young boy, my favorite movie was “The
Wizard of Oz”, and my favorite song in that movie was “Somewhere
Over the Rainbow”. Like most children, I used to dream of what
I would accomplish one day. I dreamt of having a great marriage
and raising great kids. I dreamt of actualizing my potential
and making a significant contribution to my community and my
world.
Then things fell apart for me. My mother
got sick and died, and for about ten years after that I couldn’t
get my feet under me. I went from sad to anxious to lost. By
my mid twenties, I didn’t feel much more hope.
But there was always Judy Garland. When
she seemed caught in a hopeless situation and sang “Somewhere
Over the Rainbow” it always made me cry. It made me cry for
childhood dreams that felt like they would never come true and
it made me cry because it gave me hope that I could still
achieve those dreams.
(continued) |
Happiness: Part I
The Pursuit of Happiness
by Katherine Sprague, Psy.D.
 I
recently took a trip to Philadelphia and had the opportunity to
visit the Liberty Bell and Independence Hall. Our tour of
Independence Hall got me thinking about one of the most
meaningful lines in The Declaration of Independence, which
reads:
We
hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created
equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain
unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the
pursuit of happiness.
This important
statement not only encourages the pursuit of happiness, it
describes it as an “unalienable right.” When the declaration
was signed, there was no electricity or automotive
transportation, the state of Ohio was not established, football
had never been played and outer space had yet to be explored;
however, America’s founding fathers understood the importance of
happiness. Despite all of the developments in human
intelligence over the past 230 years, our society often fails to
cultivate happiness.
A few weeks ago
I spoke with a friend who is struggling to allow herself
to be happy. She needed reassurance that being happy is
acceptable. Part of her ambivalence stemmed from allowing
others to make her feel guilty about her recent good fortune.
Her ambivalence and guilt made it difficult for her to put up
appropriate boundaries to protect her happiness. Similarly,
feeling guilty about feeling happy is a reoccurring theme in my
work with clients. One client described to me how she downplays
her happiness to assuage others’ jealously and resentment.
First
things first, happiness is not selfish. Feeling happy is
healthy, beneficial and fun. Constantly minimizing one’s
happiness for the sake of others is doing yourself a disservice
because you prevent yourself from feeling genuine positivity,
which affects your morale. Embracing happiness is a first step
towards cultivating additional positivity. Letting go of
ambivalence and guilt about being happy can allow you to exert
more energy towards pursuing happiness.
(Part II in next newsletter) |
