Being Who You Are; Without Compromise
By M.J. Clark, M.A., APR

I have recently been inspired by one of my executive coaching clients, Mike Perez, Senior Financial Advisor at Carbetta, Williamson, Pierce, Piquero & Perez, and I wanted to share his story of courage with you.

Mike and I were working on tweaking the direction in which his business was headed and discussing his ideal client. After our first couple of sessions, Mike told me his head was spinning and he was trying to get his arms around everything we had discussed.  He said it reminded him of his favorite Craig Valentine quote, “Everything is a mess before it becomes a masterpiece.” 

I think many of my clients feel this way. Some even want to give up at that point because they become scared, and they begin to feel things are getting worse, not better. But not Mike. His mind started kicking into gear and, within a short time, he began to get very clear about what he wanted.  (continued)

Happiness: Part II
Don't Wish Me Luck
by Katherine Sprague, Psy.D.

Letting go of ambivalence and guilt about being happy is a first step towards cultivating happiness.  A second step towards cultivating happiness entails taking control of your happiness.  Oftentimes happiness is equated to luck, and although luck can make us happy, it’s not the only thing that leads to happiness.  Equating happiness with luck can keep us from making our dreams come true because this mentality views happiness as being out of one’s control.  However, being happy, similar to being successful, takes effort. What are some of the things we control that lead to happiness?

Surround yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself.  In college, I was in an unhealthy relationship.  One night after my feelings were hurt by my boyfriend at the time, a friend said to me, “Katie, you need to surround yourself with people who make you feel good about yourself.”  She was right.  I was choosing to spend time with someone who left me feeling not only insecure about our relationship but about myself as well.  This was a defining moment in my life because I began to understand that I controlled aspects of my happiness.

Protect Your Happiness.  There are things in our lives we can’t control that make us unhappy such as a death in the family or a natural disaster.  However, there are things we can do on a daily basis to protect our happiness and setting boundaries is one of them.  When we allow others to cross our boundaries we end up feeling used, exhausted, resentful and any number of negative emotions.  Boundary setting is one way to minimize negative emotions and cultivate happiness.  If you’re rubbed the wrong way, say something!  If someone hurts your feelings, explain why!  If you have a need that isn’t getting met, stand up for it!  These are examples of being assertive.  Boundary setting and assertion go hand-in-hand and help protect one’s happiness.

Misery is effortless and loves company.  Happiness requires effort and those who cultivate it are likely to reap its benefits!